The Single Life: The Awkward Silence

Well it appears that everyone is writing about their first kisses. I’d like to talk about something else before we get into that.

I’d like to talk about the moment before the first kiss. Now sometimes that moment is short lived, sometimes it’s milked- but I think everybody has had a kiss that’s started with that moment.

What moment? It maybe at the end of a date, cuddling on the couch, sitting together in a parked car. Your heart starts to beat a bit faster in turn your speech speeds up a bit and eventually follows the path of your brain and turns into mush. If you had any game or sense of suave-ness you have probably lost it at that point. As a result you may start rambling or start grasping at straws to continuing what little banter is going on. You want to prolong the moment before you hit that silence, that awkward silence.

Your eyes meets hers and you notice a subtle change in her expression- little do you know that you have changed yours as well. All of a sudden you start your voice trails off and talk a bit softer- you may even start whispering for some weird reason. You both have that look and telepathically you both know you are about to make out. Now if you were like in me in current younger years you may have not have had the courage confidence to go in for that kiss, so you fumble around some more and if you are lucky you reach that point again and you go for it- or she gets tired of waiting and makes the move herself.

Now there are plenty of situations where that doesn’t happen- say you are 10 drinks deep in a bar, you have drowned those reactions away and you are ready to lock lips with anyone that agrees. I’m not saying it always happens but it happens sometimes.

Unlike my friend Candace- who could draw up a list of over 100 people she’s made out with, my list isn’t as long but at least they are memorable… well most of them.

• My first kiss was in a parked car by Crystal Lake. I was with a good friend I went to high school with but was now in college (score!) and we were talking about first kisses and I let it slipped out that I’ve yet to have one. She fixed that one up pretty quickly. I giggled right before we locked lips. Afterwards we went bowling.
• During new student orientation sophomore year: She was a freshmen and I was an Orientation Leader that was too cool for school. We were hanging out in her dorm and we had that moment… for way too long. We literally stared into each others eyes as we fumbled about with small talk. At one point I just said WTF and went in. I literally said, “oh what the fuck.”
• I’m not sure how it happened but it was Spree day. That’s all I really remembered. That and it was the middle of the day. She probably came over to my dorm room for drinks.
• She came over after Orientation junior year and we watched some romantic comedy. We were cuddling as the credits rolled and we met each other face to face and it just happened. Afterwards, I walked her over to the campus center and said goodnight. She then made out with the building manager who was closing up the building.
• A game of spin the bottle in Mara Village resulted in progressive making out with three girls. When there’s a crowd watching you really can’t really have that awkward moment.
• Technically not a first kiss but it was the first one that really counted. After a bottle of Malibu while watching Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind, we found ourselves facing each other and again, it just happened. Not much of a moment when alcohol is involved.
• I was already the life of the party after I took off my clothes and gave someone a lap dance. Fueled by some liquid confidence I spotted her across the room and I swore she looked at me and I looked at her. I walked right up to her in the middle of the room and we just went at it. The crowd roars for a second time.
• At a convention in Minnesota we go back to her room but her roommate is already back and snoring. We duck into her bathroom and after I close the door she walks up to me and pins me against it. That night turns me into a hero of the trip.
• I can’t remember this particular one rather well- it’s kinda sad because I thought she was kinda special. I think it was in her room in Mara Village. There’s been some tensions brewing up for awhile and after resisting my advances she just stares at me and darts in for a quick peck that leads into a whole lot more.
• It was her birthday and we walk back to her dorm. We shared her undersized bed together and we kiss under the moonlight shining through her window. It was a nice night but the only one we’d share together.
• After a night out we got back up to her apartment and we sit on the couch and chat. The awkward moment springs about and I recall saying an incredibly cheesy line before I go on for the kiss. We then run up to the roof so we can lock lips in front of the DC cityscape.
• I brought her home after a baseball game and we sit in my car next to her apartment, I try not to take too much of an awkward silence and just lean in at the appropriate time.
• I took her to a DMB concert and it was a kiss that came after years of anticipation. Unfortunately a big pre-game catches up with me and I’m done for the rest of the show.
• It was Caron Butler’s birthday and we celebrated in style. It either happened on the dance floor or in the cab on the way back to my place.
• After a baseball game and drinks in Clarendon I get called out for walking her in the direction of my place. It doesn’t matter however as we made out after I put my arms around her as we sit on the couch.
• We went out for drinks and I took her for a walk that ended at Lafayette Park. We sit on a bench admiring the White House and the stars and we hold hands. I turned my head and she turned hers, we look into each others eyes and I lean in.
• She invited me over and we have some drinks in her parents basement.
• I was on a mission and I spotted her across the room. I get her a drink and we danced the night away, the first kiss was a public statement in the middle of an entire room.
• After a night out we go up to her apartment. The awkward moment comes but I talk my way out of it, even explaining it before I go in for the kiss.
• Update: Because I might as well have a living document of all my hook-ups: this past spring there was the time there wasn’t an awkward silence at all. In fact it was one of the most passionate moments I’ve ever had.
• I’m surprised it doesn’t happen more often but this past summer I had the “get drunk and dance with a girl equally drunk that making out isn’t a surprise but expected” moment.
• I also had the, “we’ve been friends for awhile but all of a sudden things are different” moment. I get called out but I make this amazingly smooth move.
• It was a cold winter night and we managed to watch an episode of How I Met Your Mother but didn’t make it through the movie we picked out after.

So I want to hear about your first kiss- has anybody else had that moment?

Related posts:

1. The Single Life: 10 Reasons
2. The Single Life: The Three Day Rule
3. The Single Life: The Washing My Hair Theory
4. The Single Life: Nobody Wants To Date Me Because I’m Asian
5. The Single Life: The Antomy Of A Craigslist Ad